4 Uncommon Sexual Fantasies And What They Mean

4 Uncommon Sexual Fantasies And What They Mean

I have been studying the science of sex for the last ten years. During that time, I’ve learned a lot about what turns people on, from the vanilla to the kinky. 

Just when I thought I’d heard it all, I embarked on a study of sexual desire that ultimately became the largest and most comprehensive survey of sexual fantasies ever conducted in the United States.

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Vorarephilia: The Erotic Desire To Literally Eat (Or Be Eaten By) Someone Else

Vorarephilia: The Erotic Desire To Literally Eat (Or Be Eaten By) Someone Else

In my line of work, I’m always learning about new and unusual sexual desires. One of the most intriguing ones I have ever come across is vorarephilia, which has been described as “the erotic desire to consume, or be consumed whole and live by another person or creature” [1]. That’s right—we’re talking about people who derive sexual arousal from the thought of literally eating (or being eaten by) someone or something. There isn’t much research out there on this topic, but I happened to see a presentation on it at the International Academy of Sex Research conference earlier this month. In this post, I’ll share a few of the most interesting findings from it.

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Sex Question Friday: Are There Limits To Being Sex-Positive?

Every Friday on the blog, I answer people’s questions about sex, love, and relationships. This week’s question comes from a reader of the blog who wanted to know more about what it really means to be sex-positive.  

Do you think there ever comes a point when being sex positive has its limits? I mean, like anything else, being extreme is usually not a good idea. Let me elaborate using an example: I try to be a very sex positive person, and attempt not to judge other peoples' preferences, perspectives, fetishes, etc. However, I have come across a few scenarios where I found myself hesitating. One is a guy who will only have sex with women who are cheating on their spouses because that's the only thing that turns him on, and he takes zero responsibility for potentially hindering someone else's relationship. Another is a couple I met where the husband was a feeder and said he won't be "truly" attracted to his wife until she's well over 1000 lbs and basically immobilized. At this point I can't help but ask myself if being sex positive might actually be promoting something that is unethical (and unhealthy). In theory I'd like to think that sex positivity in and of itself is an ethical approach, but these extreme cases make me question that theory. What are your thoughts on this? I know it's not my place to judge others' decisions, but if we want to live in a just and respectful world, it seems that we all need to take responsibility for ourselves and play a role in that, no?

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