One in Five People Report Having Been in a Sexually Open Relationship

One in Five People Report Having Been in a Sexually Open Relationship

How many people have ever been involved in a consensual non-monogamous (CNM) relationship before? The results of two recent studies involving nationally representative samples (one from the United States and one from Canada) reached nearly identical conclusions: approximately 20% (or 1 in 5) respondents said they had.

The U.S. study is from 2016 and it was previously covered on the blog here; however, the Canadian study just came out, so here are a few of the highlights from it. 

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How Can I Tell If My Partner Is Cheating?

How Can I Tell If My Partner Is Cheating?

Readers of the blog often send me their questions about sex and relationships, and one that I’ve heard several times recently concerns infidelity and whether there are any reliable indicators or red flags that your partner might be unfaithful. For example, one reader asked: “How can you tell if your man is cheating? What are the signs to look for?”

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10 Facts About Cheating And Infidelity, According To Science

10 Facts About Cheating And Infidelity, According To Science

Infidelity has long been a topic of interest to scientists who study sex and relationships. Over the years, they’ve uncovered a number of fascinating things about how common cheating is, who does it, and why. Here’s a look at ten interesting things scientists have discovered about cheating.  

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Sexless Marriages: How Common Are They, And How Do People Cope With Them?

Sexless Marriages: How Common Are They, And How Do People Cope With Them?

Nationally representative U.S. survey data reveal that approximately 1 in 7 adults today are living in a sexless marriage, meaning they report engaging in little to no sexual activity [1, 2]. Despite how common sexless marriages are, surprisingly little research exists on the topic. So why does sexual activity decline in so many couples in the first place and how does it affect the partners? Also, what are the factors that might lead people to stay in sexless marriages despite the fact that the experience tends to be highly distressing?

 

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When are Married Couples Most Likely to Cheat? The Link Between Infidelity and Relationship Length

When are Married Couples Most Likely to Cheat? The Link Between Infidelity and Relationship Length

I shared an article on Twitter the other day about the prevalence of infidelity, which prompted a response from my pal Dan Savage about how cheating is associated with the length of a relationship. Basically, he wanted to know whether cheating is more or less common when you look at couples that have been together for a very long time. This is an interesting question and one that I’ve actually never been asked before, so I did some digging and here’s what I found. It turned out to be a pretty interesting story. 

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Your Personality Traits Can Predict Your Sexual Behaviors, Attitudes, and Sexual Health

Your Personality Traits Can Predict Your Sexual Behaviors, Attitudes, and Sexual Health

Your sex life is, to some extent, a function of your personality. Sex scientists have accumulated a large body of research revealing linkages between what are known as the "Big Five" personality traits and people’s sexual attitudes, behaviors, and health. These findings were recently summarized in a meta-analysis published in the journal Psychological Bulletin.

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Americans' Views on Sexual Morality are the Most Liberal on Record

Americans' Views on Sexual Morality are the Most Liberal on Record

According to the results of Gallup's 2018 Moral Issues Survey, Americans’ views on sexual morality continue to become more liberal. For the majority of issues Americans were surveyed about, Gallup actually recorded the most liberal views on record. Among the most notable changes were that more Americans than ever believe same-sex behavior, sex between unmarried adults, divorce, and having children outside of marriage are morally acceptable. However, while substantial shifts have occurred in those attitudes, Americans’ attitudes toward other sex-related issues—especially abortion and affairs—haven’t really changed much. Check out the table below for a closer look at the numbers and how they have changed in the last 17 years.

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When People Cheat, Who Do They Do It With? Is It Usually A Friend Or A Stranger?

When People Cheat, Who Do They Do It With? Is It Usually A Friend Or A Stranger?

There’s a lot of research out there looking at how many people have cheated, their reasons for cheating, and what “counts” as cheating; however, surprisingly little work has looked at who people are actually having sex with when they commit infidelity. Is it usually with someone they know, or with a stranger? And does this differ for men and women? A new study published in the Journal of Family Psychology offers some answers.

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Changes In Americans’ Attitudes Toward And Experiences With Infidelity In The Last Two Decades

Changes In Americans’ Attitudes Toward And Experiences With Infidelity In The Last Two Decades

Are Americans today more or less likely to cheat on their spouses than they were in the past? And how have their attitudes toward infidelity changed—have they become more or less tolerant of this behavior? A recent study published in the Journal of Family Psychology offers some insight into these questions.

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Our Reasons For Cheating Depend On Our Personality, Gender, and Attachment Style

Our Reasons For Cheating Depend On Our Personality, Gender, and Attachment Style

A recent study published in the Journal of Sex Research identified eight distinct motivations people can have for cheating (read all about those motives here). Beyond simply demonstrating the factors that motivate cheating, however, this study also examined how our personality, gender, and attachment style are linked to our reasons for committing infidelity. Here’s a quick review of the key findings.

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Is Watching Porn a Form of Infidelity?

Is Watching Porn a Form of Infidelity?

What “counts” as cheating on a romantic partner? It depends who you ask. Research finds that people define infidelity in very different ways. However, there are some things that people seem to agree on more than others.

For example, people largely agree that having sexual intercourse with someone who isn’t your partner is a form of cheating (assuming, of course, that you agreed to be monogamous with that partner). The same goes for taking a shower with another person or sending them naked photos. But what about just watching porn by yourself? Do people typically categorize that as a form of infidelity? A recent study published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior offers some insight into this question.

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These Are The 8 Main Reasons People Cheat

These Are The 8 Main Reasons People Cheat

Research consistently finds that between 1 in 4 and 1 in 5 married persons in the United States has committed infidelity [1]. Rates of infidelity in dating relationships are even higher. Why are so many people cheating? Surprisingly little research has explored the motivations behind infidelity; fortunately, however, a new study published in the Journal of Sex Research offers some valuable insight [2]. 

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Why Do People In Happy Relationships Cheat?

Why Do People In Happy Relationships Cheat?

There's a common tendency to assume that when someone in a relationship cheats, they're doing it because the relationship is broken; however, this isn't necessarily true. People who are perfectly happy with their partner and their relationship cheat sometimes, too. So why is that? 

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Monogamy Can’t Be Assumed—It Needs To Be Negotiated And Defined

Monogamy Can’t Be Assumed—It Needs To Be Negotiated And Defined

What does it mean to be in a monogamous relationship? It depends who you ask. In the modern world, it has become increasingly difficult to define “monogamy” in any kind of universally agreed upon way. Just think about it: what “counts” as infidelity to you? For example, does sexting someone other than your romantic partner constitute cheating? What about using an interactive pornography site?

It turns out that different people answer these questions in very different ways.

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What Does (And Doesn’t) Predict Divorce, According To Science

What Does (And Doesn’t) Predict Divorce, According To Science

Social scientists have long been interested in the factors that predict divorce. Over the years, they’ve identified a number of things that seem to increase the odds of a couple dissolving their marriage; however, the evidence hasn’t always been consistent across studies, with some effects being more reliable than others. In this article, we'll review some of the most interesting findings from this area of research.

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Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater? Here's What the Science Says

Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater? Here's What the Science Says

Is it a bad idea to get romantically involved with someone you know has committed infidelity in the past? Common sense tells us that "once a cheater, always a cheater." However, it's dangerous to rely on common sense to understand sex and relationships because research doesn't always back it up and also because different people can hold very different "common sense" beliefs. We need to look instead at what science says about whether past infidelity predicts future infidelity,

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Americans' Views on Sexual Morality are More Liberal Than Ever

Americans' Views on Sexual Morality are More Liberal Than Ever

According to the results of Gallup's 2017 Moral Issues Survey, Americans’ views on sexual morality continue to become more liberal. In fact, for a majority of the issues Americans were surveyed about, Gallup recorded the most liberal views on record. The most notable changes observed were that more Americans than ever believe same-sex behavior, sex between unmarried adults, and having children outside of marriage are morally acceptable. Although substantial shifts have occurred in those attitudes, Americans’ attitudes toward other sexual issues—particularly abortion and affairs—haven’t really changed at all. Check out the table below for a closer look at the numbers. You can also compare results from 2001 to today.

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If You Knew Someone Who Was Being Cheated On, Would You Tell Them?

If You Knew Someone Who Was Being Cheated On, Would You Tell Them?

People who cheat usually try to keep it a secret; however, they aren't always successful.

So, let's imagine for a moment that you find out someone you know has committed infidelity. What would you do: keep it to yourself, or share it with others? According to a recent study addressing this very question, our decision to reveal others’ infidelity is a very complex decision that depends upon many factors.

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Infographic: Why Infidelity is a High Risk Sexual Behavior

Infographic: Why Infidelity is a High Risk Sexual Behavior

Most people think of cheating as a risky behavior--risky in the sense that, if discovered, it could potentially lead to hurt feelings, severe conflict, and maybe even breakup. However, infidelity doesn't just put the health of a relationship at risk. Research has found that it also puts the physical health of everyone involved at risk because, when people cheat, they don't appear to be particularly likely to practice safe sex. Check out the infographic below for a look at the data.

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Is Infidelity In Our DNA?

Is Infidelity In Our DNA?

Why do we cheat? 

Undoubtedly, there are many possible reasons. For example, sometimes people commit infidelity because they are in unhappy or dysfunctional relationships. Other times, it's because people are going through a mid-life crisis or because they're simply looking for a thrill. However, some scientists have argued that yet another potential reason some people might cheat is because they have a predisposition to infidelity in their genes.

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