4 Uncommon Sexual Fantasies And What They Mean

4 Uncommon Sexual Fantasies And What They Mean

I have been studying the science of sex for the last ten years. During that time, I’ve learned a lot about what turns people on, from the vanilla to the kinky. 

Just when I thought I’d heard it all, I embarked on a study of sexual desire that ultimately became the largest and most comprehensive survey of sexual fantasies ever conducted in the United States.

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Everything You Ever Wanted To Know About Cuckolding

Everything You Ever Wanted To Know About Cuckolding

Some people are turned on by thought of watching their partner have sex with someone else. This fantasy goes by many names, but it is often referred to as cuckolding or cuckqueaning, depending on whether the person watching is male or female. Cuckolding appears to be an increasingly common sexual interest. In fact, Google searches for it have been on the rise across the last decade. It’s also worth noting that cuckolding is consistently one of the top search terms used on the world’s most popular porn sites [1].

So what do we know about cuckolding anyway?

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Our Sexual Fantasies Tell Us Something Important About Who We Are

Our Sexual Fantasies Tell Us Something Important About Who We Are

Two people can have sex fantasies about the same activity, but the way that specific activity plays out isn’t necessarily going to be the same from one person to the next. In fact, it might be very, very different. For example, if two people who had sexual fantasies about threesomes described those fantasies to you in detail, it’s quite possible that they might bear little resemblance to one another beyond the number of participants involved. One individual, for example, might describe wanting to be the center of attention and engaging in sex with two people they know extremely well; by contrast, another individual might desire a threesome with two strangers in which everyone participates equally.

What accounts for such great variability in fantasy content? I think it’s a reflection of our tendency to construct sexual fantasies that meet our unique psychological needs. A new study I published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior (co-authored by Dr. David Ley and sex advice columnist Dan Savage) supports this idea. 

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