Why We Crave Sexual Novelty--And What It Means For Our Sex Lives

Why We Crave Sexual Novelty--And What It Means For Our Sex Lives

When our interest in sex starts to wane, exposure to a new or novel partner has a way of bringing it back. This phenomenon--formally dubbed the Coolidge Effect--got its name from a popular anecdote about a visit that U.S. President Calvin Coolidge and his wife supposedly made to a chicken farm. The story goes something like this: 

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Sex Question Friday: Why Can’t I Maintain Sexual Interest In One Person?

Sex Question Friday: Why Can’t I Maintain Sexual Interest In One Person?

Every Friday on the blog, I answer people’s questions about sex, love, and relationships. This week’s question comes from a male reader who wanted to know the following:

“I seem to have a problem with sexual arousal and women I am emotionally attached to. When I met my wife, we were very sexually active, but that dwindled as we got deeper into our relationship. I thought at first maybe it was my age, but I have found myself aroused over female friends and acquaintances. The good thing is this has never developed into an affair but I would like to figure out what is wrong with me so that my wife and I can be intimate. This problem predates my wife and in the past, my girlfriends would have to at least pretend to indulge a fantasy of a threesome of them being intimate with someone else (dirty talk about it) just for me to get aroused. So I believe there is a correlation between arousal and degrees of familiarity.”

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Sex Question Friday: My Boyfriend Can't Maintain Sexual Interest In One Partner. Can Our Relationship Work?

Every Friday on the blog, I answer people’s questions about sex, love, and relationships. This week’s question comes from a female reader whose boyfriend seems to lose sexual interest in women shortly after sleeping with them. The couple is no longer having sex and she wants to know what, if anything, they can do to save their relationship.
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